


Soleil

by foxesbox



Category: jacksepticeye
Genre: Caffeine Withdrawal, Depression, Gen, Hanahaki Disease, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Scars, Self-Harm, Suicide, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-12 05:48:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16867258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foxesbox/pseuds/foxesbox
Summary: This is based very roughly on the song Soleil, where a girl saves a bunch of people from the ‘darkness’. In this case, Jackie/Jay is saving three egos from their own darkness (Chase is anxiety/depression/negative thoughts, Schneep is caffeine withdrawal/exhaustion, Marvin is hanahaki disease). When Jay helps them, he ends up absorbing that problem himself and experiencing it, sometimes even worse.





	Soleil

**Author's Note:**

> I call Jackaboy 'Jay' as I prefer it over Jack/Jackie :)

Jay glides his hands gently over the scars on Chase’s arms, humming softly as his eyes glow a soft blue light. Chase shivers. He wasn’t sure what to think when Jay said he could take away all of his pain, all of his hurt and bad thoughts. He honestly hadn’t believed the hero but decided to humor him anyway. But as Jay softly ran the tips of his fingers over the white lines he noticed them begin to fade, almost like they were being erased. It was strange. Jay pulls away from Chase’s arms and gently cups his face with one hand, the other running through his hair. Chase smiled and leaned into the touch, feeling the worry and panic and the dark, dark thoughts slowly melt away. Jay pressed a kiss to Chase’s forehead when he was done. Chase walked away with a silent thank you, having been left speechless.  
Jay feels the sharp pain shoot up his arm as soon as Chase leaves the room. He looks down and sees the blood seeping through his shirt. But it was ok. He was being a hero.

Schneep was next on Jay’s list. The doctor had been hard to convince, trying to tell Jay that he was perfectly fine. But Jay had simply shaken his head and taken hold of Schneep’s hand, sitting him down. His fingers work through Schneep’s hair, scratching softly. Schneep stared up in awe at the way Jay’s eyes glowed. His hands moved down to Schneep’s face, his thumbs gently running over the dark circles that had appeared under his eyes. The doctor sighed quietly as he felt his exhaustion lift, and the headache he’d gotten from the lack of coffee disappeared. Jay pulled back when he was done and Schneep stood up, stretching his arms above his head before leaving, mumbling something about getting to bed on time.  
The door closed and Jay felt his legs almost give out. He grabbed hold of the office chair, feeling himself grow dizzy, eyes heavy. It’s ok, he whispered to himself as he stood up straight again. He still had people to help.

Jay went to Marvin last. He knew how this meeting would go, knew how it would end. He found Marvin crying in his room, eyes bloodshot. He barely reacted to Jay’s presence at all until he took his hands and pulled him up. One hand moved to the back of his neck as he leaned in and pressed his lips to Marvin’s. He felt guilty doing this, but he knew the pain would all go away soon. It would be fine. It would be. His other hand pressed against Marvin’s chest and he could already feel his own growing tighter, could already feel the tears running down his own face, could already feel the emotions growing stronger. Marvin clung onto him desperately, kissing back. It wouldn’t last long though. Jay pulled away from the kiss, soft fingers running lightly over Marvin’s face and then through his hair. Marvin’s eyes closed and his face grew peaceful. He smiled.  
“Thank you.”

Jay had returned to his room that night, but only just. As soon as he closed the door he collapsed onto the floor, legs finally giving out, his head aching, his throat stinging and tears pouring from his eyes. He coughed and felt the blood drip onto the floor. His chest continued to feel tight as he coughed again, entire flowers joining the blood staining his carpet. He ripped off the bandages he’d covered his arms with earlier to see the cuts still hadn’t stopped bleeding either.  
It was fine. Although that was getting harder to believe as his head pounded and his body felt weak, his head filling with the dark thoughts he was protecting his friends from.  
Was he really fine? It didn’t matter. He didn’t matter. He just wanted his friends to be happy. To be healthy. To be alive. If he had to carry all their problems for them, he would. Gladly. They didn’t deserve that.  
His vision grew blurry and the room looked like it was spinning. He coughed again. The pounding in his head seemed to be getting worse, louder almost. He fell down onto his side, the arm he was using to prop himself up giving out just as his legs had.  
Pounding. Louder and louder. He could hear voices too. Voices.. Shouting. Panicked shouting over the constant thudding of-  
His door burst open just as his eyes shut.  
He just smiled as he heard the voices drift further away and his senses started to fade.


End file.
